Sending NoOds and Sluut Shaming

I am suddenly reminded that this country, both of them, murica and canadia were founded by people who were too puritanical for puritanical England.

Our forefathers fucked their good wives through holes in bedsheets and slapped scarlet letters and scorn on anyone who dared break this really weird tradition.

Tablecloths were invented right around the same time in England, as table legs resembled women’s appendages and were too suggestive. And people still left because that wasn’t quite uptight enough for them.

Apparently, we have no come that far…like at all.

So, I posted what I thought was a really good idea on my Facebook page.

Watermark your nudes with the dude’s name so you know who leaked them if they do get leaked.

Fucking brilliant.

Right?

Wrong.

Cue the army of Karens clutching their pearls.

dOn’T SeNd NoooooOOOOOdDS.
Don’t you have any self-respect?
Think of the children.

Okay back up.

Simmer down.

Listen Linda.

I would never tell anyone they must send nudes.
How ridiculous would I sound?
I’m not even saying it’s a great idea.
Just, if you do, here’s a thing you can do to make it safer.
It’s a personal choice.

Why you telling me what to do with my body?

I would also never photograph anyone without their consent.
Nor share personal photographs without asking.
In fact I will react violently to being filmed or photographed in public or at work without my consent.
Women are not things, we are not free porn. Pornhub is free porn.

And I do not like unsolicited dick pics, no one does.

But body autonomy 101, it’s mine. I like it. I like being naked. I have a tiny computer with a camera in it in my hand. If I am feeling sexy and I happen to be nude, I’m taking a pic. And I am sending it to whomever I please.

In the time called ‘before’ I had a cache of good ones. I sent them to more than one suitor. I am totally fine with this. They were too. I sent them nudes, do not look a gift nude in the mouth? That just sounds weird.

Wolf expressed a desire to have certain things that were just for him. My ass for one, some bra and pantie sets I bought specifically just for him and any picture I send. It’s part of our custom agreement and I abide. I’m His and I love him.

There is one pic of me that I took with the blue starry filter on Snapchat, just my face, it’s his favorite. I offered to put it on Instagram so he could find it whenever he wanted. He said no, it belongs to him.
So, no one will ever see that picture except him and I. Simple respectful act.

I have never sent him anything out of the cache either. But I am getting off topic.

Nudity empowers some. Modesty empowers others.

I would never dream of telling anyone else what to do with their body and I am getting sick and tired of Susan telling me what to do with mine.

Stop slut shaming.

Period. Full stop.

Some people like to fuck and be naked, get over it.

No one is coming into your house with bondage gear forcing you out of your vanilla sex every other Tuesday after book club and a glass of white wine routine. You do you boo.

You might have to have an uncomfortable conversation with your kids because, they now walk around with tiny computers and cameras in the pockets and there is pressure to send nooooods. I am not down with that at all. Consent consent consent. Coercion is not consent.

In fact, “send n00ds” is where I lose interest with dudes. It’s a turn off. So are, and I cannot emphasis this enough, unsolicited dick pics.

Also, I am not always feeling sexy or like finding the right lighting and contorting my body just so with my phone high and to the right, you can pull a muscle getting a good one. Although I did have amazing success getting some great butt shots with a pile of books on the coffee table and the timer.

Here is where this gets dangerous. Beyond a leg cramp.

At best it’s a debate on the internet, an irritating tiresome debate, but okay.

At worst, it’s the Salem witch trials. Women being put to death because of the ignorance of power-hungry men and the jealousy of other women. Stop, those are your sisters.
Women have got to stop shaming other women.
I have nothing against book clubs, white wine and vanilla sex.
I prefer strip clubs, whiskey and rough stuff with my dom, buuuuttttt….to each their own. If it isn’t happening to your body in your bedroom, it’s not your business.

It gets really extra ultra dangerous is when Quebec police let a violent sex offender out on a day pass and gave him a green light to see a prostitute and he killed her. Her life was not worth less because of her profession. But to them she was somehow worth the risk.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/montreal/eustachio-gallese-1.5439020

There is a correlation here. Slut shaming is real. It is deeply rooted in our unfortunate male dominated, puritanical, bible thumping heritage.

It can be something as little as an offside comment like ‘how many dudes are you sending pics too, lol’ to something as extreme as death.

I am going to close this out with 2 of the intelligent, poignant comments left on this thread.

Aside from a shithead breaking someone’s trust, can we just talk about the fact it’s JUST nudity. Big deal. Everyone has a body under clothing we are all naked. We need to stop shaming and being ashamed. It’s just nudity for goodness sake. People don’t get as bent out of shape about violence, as they do about nakedness, and that’s seriously fucked up.

I don’t get it, y’all know these puritanical, archaic ideas were created to keep us smaller, weaker, more subservient, easier to control and mistreat… Don’t buy into that shit, it’s not cute and really just makes you look dumb as hell.

Preach.