I went looking for my horoscope before I started writing this. It’s not there yet, but this was…
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I had such a lovely Sunday. I truly did. Protective circle of pretty boys at the bar, made a bit of money, had charming conversations and I didn’t get too drunk. Got tipped on stage. Everyone left in a good mood.
Then came Monday.
What the actual fuck Monday?
That was just rude.
I usually love Monday’s late start, early finish, day off the next day. But we can’t play cards and I am pushing through until my girls get here so I can have a good night out.
This was not a good night.
Add to it the loveliness of Sunday as a juxtaposition. Just heinous fuckery most foul.
Nightmare night.
I have slept with 2 people since I got here and at one point they were the only 2 people in the bar.
Nope and the one that should have been a nope and never fucking happened.
Wait, back up.
The bar was dead for most of the night, except for one exceptionally obnoxious drunk man.
I have dated alcoholics that hit me and hurt me, and I can recognize the ones who have a mean streak. This one did so I steered clear until he poked me, and even then I stayed calm and told him ‘no touching.’ He called me an asshole and was asked to leave.
Then I get a message request on Instagram. Ex hubby asking me if I am a Newfie now.
It’s been 4 years since we had any kind of contact. It didn’t go well last time.
He asked me if I remembered why he stopped talking to me.
“I am a giant whore.”
“I was gonna say oversharing, but I suppose it’s the same thing.”
Kinda wish he had just said what he wanted to say in the first few lines which was he would look after my son so I could go be happy. But we have never been able to keep things short and sweet. We had text fights that would go on for days and days. I am not that girl anymore.
“Looks like you are stripping.”
“I am.”
And it kinda went downhill from there.
None of these things were really enough to make the night that bad exactly. Drunk Josh, no the other Josh, Josh with the crazy girlfriend Josh popped in and was in a sooky mood and pulled me into his lap and bought me a couple whiskeys. So that was nice. The lack of clientele meant we didn’t have to go on stage till late, so that was good too.
Nope showed up mid stage show looking adorable. I am still unsettled by this. He said something about making me lose focus, to which I replied “It’s not the same anymore, you broke whatever this was, and I wish you hadn’t.”
I miss the attention. He gave really good attention.
The other one however. I do not miss. I regret. And I rarely regret anything.
And of course he waltzed into the bar last night. Asshole. Who takes pictures of sleeping girls and shows their friends? Apparently that guy. I do not like being recognized by a boy I have never met because he saw pics of me sleeping naked. The level of creepiness is overwhelming.
I wish I had a magic eraser for that few weeks of my life. I was exceptionally depressed and made a very bad decision which I think was a catalyst for other things not going my way. Lesson learned.
And kudos to the Nope, I told him what was happening and he asked me what I needed him to do.
“Just stay with me for a minute.” And he did.
The other one left without incident and everyone seems to have slipped into the portal wherever fuck boys go.
I made it, I always do. No meltdown, despite a thousand triggers.
Tonight is a new moon, thank god. We need a little new around here.
Good omens and moonflowers instead of a chaotic mess in a scary place.
I cussed out the creep so hopefully he will stay the fuck away.
“I pity your wife if you think 6 minutes is forever” Freddie Mercury
Also, if you are gonna be a fuck boy of epic proportions at least be good at fucking.
